Hello. For those who don’t already know, my name is Andrea. Exactly 67 days from today I will marry the man of my dreams…and his employer, the US Navy. Very shortly after that, our new life together as lovey-dovey newlyweds will be put on hold as he deploys for about 7 months. Please, please…try to harness your jealousy. 😉
Clint and I are just short of our 3 year dating “anniversary.” Looking back on our relationship it is sometimes hard to believe what we have overcome. Living about 2 hours apart from each other, he just miles from NAS Whidbey Island and I near Seattle, our relationship has been limited to weekends only. We have never spent more than 10 consecutive days together. During a non-deployment year, a “year together” really equates to about 75-100 days when you consider the distance and all the detachments.* That number drops by about 50% on a deployment year. To say that it has been one hell of a ride would be an understatement…but I am so unbelievably, head over heels, madly in love with this man that this roller coaster has been completely worth it.
As I begin to think and prepare myself for the idea of another 6-7 months without him, I can’t help but feel completely overwhelmed. This deployment will be very different than the last few. The obvious change is that we will now be newly married. We likely won’t get to celebrate our first Christmas together. I will build our first home together alone. But the biggest change will be the inability to communicate the way we could when he was in Afghanistan. The options are much more limited when on the carrier and over this past month I am learning that I will need to be satisfied with 1 phone call a month and daily emails (if we’re lucky). Well on the bright side, at least it isn’t snail mail. 🙂 I give mad props to those before me who got by that way.
All this pretty much leads up to why I have decided to start this blog. I realized that I need an outlet. I need a way to help myself overcome this anxiety, fear, anger, sadness…any emotion that might come up. I definitely do not intend for it to always be a negative thing, I most certainly hope to share my ups as well as my lows. But my goal is to basically write this like a journal. I want it to be raw, honest, and a true reflection of how I may feel at any given point in time.
Why make it public you may ask? Ultimately this is really something I want to do for myself. But, anyone in my situation undoubtedly knows how easy it is to feel completely alone. Even if you are lucky enough to be surrounded by fabulous friends and family, if they aren’t in a military relationship of some sort unfortunately they will never understand how you feel. Allowing myself to be this vulnerable will not be easy, but I truly hope with all my heart that this blog will be a source of comfort to at least one Navy significant other out there…you are not alone. I feel what you feel.
Well it is getting late, and C is finally online to chat. Adios.
*The dispatch of a military unit, such as troops or ships, from a larger body for a special duty or mission.