i feel…

i feel really defeated today. 

i feel alone, i feel tired, i feel sad, i feel weak, i feel jealous, i feel angry, i feel selfish, i feel overwhelmed. 

i feel like a horrible wife because i can’t hold it together and be strong when clint calls. 

i feel like the times we talk should be happy and exciting, but sometimes they aren’t because my emotions get the best of me.

i feel like this deployment is never going to end.

i feel like kidnapping clint and escaping to a far away place where we can finally spend some time together.

i feel like things should be easier considering this is my 3rd time dealing with a deployment.

i feel almost embarrassed to admit that i’m struggling.

i feel incredibly proud to have a husband willing to make such great sacrifices for our country…but i wish the sacrifice didn’t have to be our relationship.

i feel like having my husband back.

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3 thoughts on “i feel…

  1. I think feelings are fleeting.I think it's ok to feel vulnerable…but at times like this remember what you do have, not what you don't.I think you are lucky to have found the one who completes you. Some aren't that fortunate and are still in search of somone special.I think you have a strong support system of friends and family who are there for you when your back is against the wall, so you should never feel alone.I think it's cool that you are still keeping up this blog.I think you are stronger than you think you are.I think good things come to those who wait.

  2. I think all those things you're feeling are normal considering what you're going through. Being without someone you love never gets easier. You're allowed to have those feelings. I do hope you feel more hopeful soon, though.

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